Oh, dead turkey you got me good!

Long time no hear from huh? Have you read my blog? Do you like it? Well you'd do well to remind so I can keep this damn thing up. I totally forgot about this blog. How did I do that? Well, when you get a case of the readprintsnitches then you begin to have a little bit of distaste for blogging. But I'm sitting here to talk about the damn turkey.

Evil turkey, bad bad turkey. First off I don't even really like the holidays. It usually bums me out.
Now I'm doing my best to improve my dementia on the holidays and try to build a tivo into my brains so I can replay my October for 59 days straight as to not avoid New Years Eve. I'll of course make promises to my pseudo drunk self as if I care. Now the one thing about thanks giving I do remember is all the food and adults laughing and talking about things about. The thing I hate about TG is the shitlings, or chitterlings. I know there was a time when you had to eat absolutely every part of the pig to survive. I don't thing there was an animal on a farm who was exempt from mouth demolition, but hell, for some reason that piggly wiggly got the prize for baest bang for your buck! Well you know there's the smell. You know the part of the Matrix when Agent Smith says, "Its the smell, if there is such a thing?" There is a such a thing and it pisses me off to have to clean the poop bugs out of a mop busket of chitterlings. I've done it once and only once. Maybe twice, but I blocked that out of my mind just like when I saw that He-Man was a fairy.

Ok, My buddy loves the chitterlings. Good for him. Its just not my thing. I remember the first time cleaning them and I saw the busket they came in. I looked over and saw the same red busket with a paint brush in it. The good thing about chitterlings is that it does promote reusable recourses. I mean, we all know what they are and if you can find a way to make supper out of a poop tube then you're pretty damn resourceful.

So after having the revelation that chitterlings stink, are hard to clean, and only provide me with useful mop buskets. I thought, "Well maybe they will taste good?" Negative Houston! You have to cover this jelly pool with anything that's hot sauce based. Two thre drops of hot sauce (tabasco) and you're pretty good. (Of you're using Tabasco you're probably not going to be eating chitterlings) But no, It is once agian the great flood and you must cover the earth in hot sauce to virtually numb every taste bud on your tube to fool you're idiot palette that you are eating a poop tube. So lets forget everything I just told you and move over to other dishes. No, let's stop there.